I made a passing observation this morning while reading through Proverbs, one that I find interesting in light of some of the accusations against Christianity I've read lately. On several occasions, I've heard critics of Christianity claim as one of their arguments that the Bible is pointedly suppressive of women. These critics like to take passages that refer to the God-designed role of women as virtuous helpers and completer of their husbands out of context, (often quoting the already difficult to understand King James language), and twist them to support their preconceived opinions that Christianity is about suppressing and abusing women. Apparently the faith is only acceptable to unrefined, backwoods simpletons who think women are meant to be kept at home, pregnant and barefoot.

While I will admit what I am about to write is not the end-all point to convince everyone this accusation is pathetic, I've never heard or read any critic who considered this observation. What I am referring to is the Proverbs' use of the feminine to personify Wisdom. That's right - the very book that supposedly teaches Christians that women are nothing more than slaves with benefits uses the feminine to bring to life the greatest object of pursuit. Starting as early as chapter 1, we read of Lady Wisdom calling out to all who can hear, begging them to take advantage of the wonderful and purposeful life only she can give. We read that she was the first brought into existence by God, present when He founded the universe. Through her we can understand the meaning of life, and how to make life count. She repeatedly calls out that she is freely available to all who will seek her. What's the catch? Start with God. It all starts with recognizing God, and submitting to the right relationship with Him. Unfortunately, too many are unwilling to accept these terms, and instead, look in all the wrong places for wisdom. As a result, lives are ruined, while Lady Wisdom continues to call out,

"Simpletons! How long will you wallow in ignorance?

Cynics! How long will you feed your cynicism?

Idiots! How long will you refuse to learn?

About face! I can revise your life. Look, I'm ready to pour out my spirit on you;

I'm ready to tell you all I know. As it is, I've called, but you've turned a deaf ear;

I've reached out to you, but you've ignored me."

Proverbs 1:22-24 (The Message).

Today makes four - four times in less than a week God has put me in a conversation to speak to someone so that He could speak to me. It seems that in each of these four conversations, all with other believers, the central themes have been things God desperately wants me to believe in real-life form. On the surface of these instances, it appears that I was the one doing the encouraging; that I was the one reminding the struggling one of God's truths. I saw their faces brighten, their eyes light up as God's hope made sense to them again. I saw their demeanors changed, their countenance lifted right in front of me. I saw them smile through tears, some that were outward, some that were hidden. I walked away with an attitude of prayer, asking God to help them understand His love, timing, ultimate control and faithfulness. I saw God help them through my voice.

What they didn't see, was God trying to speak to me. I don't know that a single word was spoken through my mouth that wasn't intended by God for my ears and heart. I've often known God to guide me through the Bible. More often than I realize, He has spoken to me through the advice of others. Recently, He brought to mind an instance that occurred some three years before to confirm the answer to my question. I have even had thoughts I assumed to be random proven to be God's answer to my prayer. But now, for the first time I can remember, God has spoken to me by using me to speak to others. How great and personal is God! It is amazing that the creator and keeper of all that is would be so involved in my life!

I started this post a week ago, but couldn't seem to get it finished. For some reason, my thoughts wouldn't quite come together, so this is what I want to say as "to the point" as I can make it...

I have decided that my definition of trust has been incomplete. Without consulting a dictionary, I would say an accurate definition of trusting someone is believing that person will do right toward you in spite of your downfalls and sins against him or her. In other words, there is an element to trust that we often overlook - the element of vulnerability.

When we speak of trust, we usually refer to trusting someone with a responsibility, such as making good on a promise, telling the truth, getting a job done, or remaining faithful to a relationship. This last one, though, also carries a parallel responsibility on the part of the one who is trusting. For trust to be authentic, the one trusting has to be authentic, which means he must extend the courtesy of honesty about himself to the one he trusts.

Trust is about relying on another person. Complications come, however, when the one trusting is not honest about himself, including his failures. This is what makes real trust so difficult. In our society, we are taught (quite easily, I might add) that acceptance must be earned. Trying to earn acceptance leads to striving to be acceptable, which means we have to have some reason to prove we should be accepted. Unfortunate to this strife, though, is the fact that we are human, meaning we carry histories of bad choices, sins, and regrets, which make us unacceptable on basis of merit. The complications grow when we try to fix our unacceptability. In order to make ourselves more acceptable, we hide the truth about who we are until we believe we have built a good enough track record of behavior to make us acceptable. Hiding who we are makes authentic trust impossible, because the one we are trusting doesn't know the one he is being trusted by.

Sadly, this desire to be acceptable has kept friends of mine from trusting in Christ. From more than one person, I have heard something like, "I want to be a real Christian when I become one," or, "When I know I can get it right, I'll start being a Christian. I don't want to be fake." The problem is, none of us will ever build up enough good to undo our bad. In fact, our problem isn't the number of sins we commit in the first place. Our problem is our sinful nature. This is why we are all basically the same. whether the Apostle Paul, Saddam Hussein, Martin Luther King, the terrorists of 9-11, Mother Teresa, or you and me, we all have a natural inclination to do things our own way instead of God's way, and we all are deserving of the death that sinfulness cost. The only way out is for someone who is worthy of being acceptable to take away our unacceptableness. That is exactly what Jesus did, and He only ask that we trust Him. We cannot trust Him, though, if we are hiding who we are, hoping to make ourselves worthy of His acceptance of us.

This also parallels our relation to one another. While my failures don't need to be reported in the daily news, if I put on a false front to hold me over while I become acceptable, authentic trust cannot exist. Why can't people trust the church? Why can't Christians trust each other? Why can't a husband trust a wife or a wife a husband? Why can't we really trust God? Maybe it isn't a matter of "can't" but a matter of "won't." Or, more accurately, instead of "won't" it is a matter of "want." We want to be the hero. We want to be good enough. While for the want of being good enough, we miss out on the greatest gift - the gift of fellowship with God and with others.